At least 10 years ago, after being out of work for eighteen months after a hip replacement, I bit the hand off the first law firm to offer me a job.
What followed was the strangest five years I have ever spent in a company allegedly run by adults.
Whenever I tell a story to someone who hasn’t worked there, they respond with “Huh, you’ve gotta be exaggerating”, but if I tell a story to someone who has worked there, they hit back but, “That’s nothing, remember the time when…”
And everyone would die.
Below are the stories in order that they were published – and I have aimed for chronological order in telling them. Because there are so many names, I have created a bestiary so you can keep track of who’s who.
As it happens, Dodge & Burrow no longer exist. They merged with another company and lost their identity. One of the first things the takeover company did was to hack out all the dangerous parts – the Senior Secretaries who kept offering medical advice, the bullies, the baffling hierarchy. Anyone who previously worked there finds this hilarious. I still smile when I think about it.
And for the sake of keeping my skin if my real name ever gets attached to this blog: I have been working for an amazing law firm (top 20) for five years at the time of writing this page (Nov 2017). I don’t have any hilarious stories about them. It’s disappointing that I can’t tell ridiculous stories about them, but my mental health really appreciates the difference.
Current law firm: I ♥ you.
(For some reason, the plugin is listing them backwards, no matter what options I pick. Odd.)